Project Runway

Ashley Nell Tipton is the new Anya Ayoung-Chee, only instead of shitting the bed then making a jumpsuit at the 11th hour, she makes a crop top and circle skirt.

Anya had the then trendy long hair mohawk mismatched 1980s earring thing going on.

Ashley has the now trendy all mauve everything pastel goth thing going on.

Both made v. cute but completely pedestrian looking and simply made clothes that the judges would usually rip someone a new asshole for, but were treated as the second coming of Christ when they sent their models down the runway.

Bad vibes I’m telling you, bad vibes.

Sorry Edmond, I think Ashley is going to walk away with that sweet, sweet, Sally Beauty/Best Western money.

Project Runway Season 14, Episode 2: Manatee Penis vs. Pinata Vagina

“I think Merline needs to go home now. That thing is falling apart, and not to be vulgar, she has some gray thing in the front that looks like a big ol’ manatee penis. Nobody wants to see a manatee penis walking down a runway.”

Amanda, Project Runway Season 14

The aforementioned manatee penis dress:


While Merline’s dress may have gestured towards a manatee cock, Gabrielle made a straight up vagina dress. It wasn’t vaginal, it was a straight up fringed vagina made of shredded Hallmark Cards (it was the unconventional materials challenge) which kind of sounds like part of a feminist manifesto, when you think about it.


Michael Kors Shade Throwing Megacut

I was trying to get my sister into Project Runway and because she is the way she is her first question was “has anyone gotten camel-toe on the runway” at which point I obviously had to bring up Sandro from last season and his 1950s parachute burlesque Soviet teen street urchin chic bathing suit from last season, and how his poor model’s vagina was falling out (I know Jezebel it’s not a vagina blah blah blah…) Anyway while looking for that video, my sister found this beautiful megacut of the annoying orange himself, Michael Kors, chastising designers for their serape pole dancer diaper shorts.

“You achieved the impossible. She has camel toe in big shorts.”

– Michael Kors