Bonsoir

Man, fuck Nuit Blanche. It failed me twice, so last night I gleefully abstained. Kicked off the night by drinking flat diet coke in my living room and watching the Leafs get fucked up the ass by the Caps. I guess I didn’t fully meet my goal of avoiding shitty video installations etc. because we watched the CN Tower fail to fully sync up with CIUT from our deck. Kind of a sick idea, using those much bemoaned LED lights as a visualizer, and I support any (much needed) advertising that non-engineering shit at U of T gets, but that exhibit did not last all night by any stretch.

After getting bored with the lights and the Leafs loosing we all went to Futures because it would ensure a smooth transition between eating our faces off and getting drunk, since we would only have to move 15 feet to get to Lab for $3 tequila night. Ended up making a detour to this Leafs swag van they had set up outside the Brunny where Geoff stole me a flag. While carrying it into Lab I got shit from the bouncer for having a Leafs flag but an American ID? Because that’s somehow my fault? No idea. Drank a bunch of sangria, listened to them play the Ghostbusters theme song and covers of “My Boyfriend’s Back,” then went home and made peanut butter toast and watched the Leafs loose a second time during the replay.

I stand by my choices. I’d rather listen to shitty music and watch the Leafs loose multiple times than go to Nuit Blanche, as long as there is free shit and decent food involved.

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Annex Adventures

Fuck it was so ~*lovely*~ out on Friday, Jessica and I determined it was imperative we find a way to enjoy the weather whileย  eating for maximum joyousness. So we went to Victory Cafe since neither of us had ever been there, and our food bible BlogTO always writes favorably about it.

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We walked past this “mural” on Harbord. Children make shitty artists. I support the tiny Wu Tang fan in his/her quest to reach their full thug potential, but the crazy mouse man beast (is its Afro shaped into ears, or is it a black Mickey Mouse?) was fucking disturbing.

Anyways, we got a prime patio spot at Victory, and promptly ordered foooood.

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I got a cheeseburger and Jessica got chili-cheese fries. I don’t know if its just because now, left to my own devices, I am starving, but I swear to God it was the best fucking burger I have ever had. And it came with this tiny container of ranch-like sauce that I kept dipping my fries in because though not visibly obese, I am so fucking fat on the inside.

Janice came by but we were already done eating so we moved on to Green Room so that she could get food and continue the patio adventure.

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But not before being intimidated by Honest Ed’s.

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Yay Green Room.

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So we sat on the patio that no one knew existed until recently, and Janice ordered a sandwich and we got a few drinks. I do not trust the food at Green Room. Just because a place serves food does not mean you should eat it. They have sweet massive plates of $2 fries, and “quesadillas” (really just cheese in a tortilla) that I’m obsessed with, but I’m not venturing beyond that. Its a student pub, they can pull a tap or mix simple drinks and maybe bring you a plate of nachos, but I refuse to anything masquerading as a real meal.

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It got pretty fucking gloomy out so we went inside. Our preemptive strike against mother nature allowed us to claim the couches, usually impossible because under normal circumstances no one ever leaves the building before midnight, but the experience was kind of wasted on the fact that there were like, 3 of us. Geoff and Paul came down, then we headed to Lab for $3 Jack night. Evidently $3 gets you a lot of Jack at Lab. Even Geoff, who shortly after I met him, was drinking whiskey and milk or some other abhorrent combination, thought the drinks were fucking strong.

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Then Jessica, Geoff and Paul left to go see The Miles play at The Boat, but I was so fucking tired even my love of infectious dance music could not keep me awake.

Did he just talk to me like I was ugly?

Just encountered the Pita Pit asshole of life. Yeah I’d be pissed too if I worked at Pita Pit but you don’t have to be such a dick. I asked for a turkey pita and he stares at me blankly for like 30 seconds before going “what KIND of turkey pita?” UM the fucking kind where you take turkey out of your little fridge and put it on my fucking pita and hand it to me, christ.

My obsession with comas/severe head trauma lives on. I spent like an hour on Wikipedia reading related shit. I blame The Odyssey. I remember a really long time ago Lainna said something about how she felt it said something about her as a person that as a child her favorite movie was Labyrinth when that movie is totally fucked and most people only come to enjoy it for its 1980s insanity in their adult years. When I was a kid my favorite show was The Odyssey and only now do I realize how absolutely fucked and potentially scarring it was. This nerdy little kid wants tries to befriend this band of assholes who steal a telescope given to him by his dead father who FELL OVERBOARD ON THEIR FISHING TRIP TOGETHER then he falls out of a tree fort and gets knocked into a coma where he’s trapped in this fantasy world that’s basically a police state inhabited only by kids. The show cuts back and fourth between Jay, the little kid, trapped in the coma-fantasy world and his Mom in the hospital trying to wake his shit up.

I wish this show was on DVD.

Anyway, look at all the fucked up shit that can happen as a result of head injuries.

A drastic treatment for increased [intracranial pressure] is decompressive craniectomy, in which a part of the skull is removed and the dura mater is expanded to allow the brain to swell without crushing it or causing herniation. The section of bone removed, known as a bone flap, can be stored in the patient’s abdomen and resited back to complete the skull once the acute cause of raised ICP’s has resolved. Alternatively a synthetic material may be used to replace the removed bone section

Yeah I’m fucked I know.

Ugh I don’t want to eat this pita it was made with malice.

Taco Night at Paulexander’s

Yesterday we all went to Paul’s to have a Taco Night.

It was cute. Janice & Nathan brought homemade guacamole, Mike showed up with a case of beer, and Business Geoff brought ice cream and a bottle of wine. It was such a nice day everyone hung out on the balcony.

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We started watching this thing on YouTube called Hard Gay… I don’t know. Mike & Nathan knew about it. It’s this Japanese guy who dresses up in leather and acts like / is a flamboyant homosexual.

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In the episode we were watching he was trying to help Yahoo increase business (because Yahoo needs more business?) In the end he hoists himself up a Yahoo billboard wrapped in Christmas lights.

I do not understand other cultures.

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Mike wanted to go to a bar on Bloor. So we went to Lab where it was $4.25 Martini Wednesday. Mike ended up leaving after one drink to go back to Oakville, but Jessica, Paul, Geoff and I stuck around for a pitcher. Somehow the night ended with a discussion of MILFs which led to Geoff and I making a bet of who would be the first to sleep with someone over 30 before graduation.

Then we ran into Keswick on St. George driving his fucking Mercedes SL-55 because he’s an asshole.

Then I watched 2 episodes of Disband, ate a bowl of cereal and went to bed.