U.S. Citizenship + Babies + McDonald’s

I GOT MY U.S. CITIZENSHIP after a thousand years.

Not that I applied a thousand years ago, that went fairly fast, but I’ve lived here since I was eleven (minus college) so everyone I know from Canada thought I was American and everyone I knew from America mostly didn’t know I was Canadian. I’ve felt like both forever, and time-wise my life has been spent almost exactly 50-50 between the two, so it wasn’t so much like gaining something so much as it was… feeling acknowledged? I know that doesn’t fit the patriotic rhetoric, but if someone talks shit about America I will feel compelled to talk shit about them and if someone talks shit about Canada I will feel compelled to talk shit about them and that I think, is the true test of citizenship.

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The Bronx – History’s Stranglers

No need for safe return, it’s no need for your concern
There is no warning, I’m not ignoring
I follow you across the county lines
These beads of sweat feel like a flood

You motherfucker I want your blood

Flu shot / Halloween 2015

Dude, so first of all, I got a motherfucking flu shot and my arm hurt for two days. Like a charlie horse running from my shoulder to my wrist, and all the bones in the wrist and the back of my hand felt like I beat them against a wall. I rested. I elevated. I tried doing push ups and swinging my arm around. The only advice on Mayo Clinic genunely amounted to “stop being a pussy.” I couldn’t sleep allllll night. What IS that? I got the flu shot last year and it definitely ached, but I wasn’t in uncontrollable pain that acetaminophin couldn’t touch.

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